Elementary Mathematics

Hello, friends.
This is Umi.
I got this mail from my friend.

Sharing..

----- Original Message -----

Subject: Elementary Mathematics

Have a good laugh people :))


SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

GENERAL EQUATIONS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand
her at all.

LONGEVITY STATISTICS

Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more
willing to die.

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and
cackling, telling me, "You're next."
They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

SEND THIS TO A SMART WOMAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND TO THE
SMART GUYS WHOM YOU KNOW CAN HANDLE IT.

Hi Umi-san.
LTNS. This is Moring.

〉I got this mail from my friend.
You are changing email with foreigners, aren't you?

〉Sharing..
These are very funny. Thank you.

And I tried to make one.
Would you read this?

Feel Safe

A man feels safe when he is with his wife and children.
A woman feels safe when she is without her husband and children.

Do you make sense?
Happy Reading and Writing!
Moring

〉Hi Umi-san.
〉LTNS. This is Moring.

Hello, Moring. This is Banana.

〉And I tried to make one.

You are supposed to do.

〉Would you read this?

Yes, sure, I want read.

〉Feel Safe

〉A man feels safe when he is with his wife and children.
〉A woman feels safe when she is without her husband and children.

〉Do you make sense?

I see your meaning.
Because I have such wife.
( PLEASE DO NOT SAY TO MY WIFE THAT I SAY SUCH THING )
( PLEASE FORGET IT )

〉Happy Reading and Writing!
〉Moring

Happy Reading and Writing and NOT speaking about my wife.

〉Moring

Banana

Hi guys! ←I'm afraid of too casual.
This is Umi.

〉〉Feel Safe

〉〉A man feels safe when he is with his wife and children.
〉〉A woman feels safe when she is without her husband and children.

〉〉Do you make sense?

〉I see your meaning.
〉Because I have such wife.
〉( PLEASE DO NOT SAY TO MY WIFE THAT I SAY SUCH THING )
〉( PLEASE FORGET IT )

HAHAHA! You're a gentle husband. I think she is so happy.

〉〉A woman feels safe when she is without her husband and children.

I thought it's a great response.
I felt 「そう、きたかー！！」when I read it.

Partly(!?) I agree with this.
Maybe I'm such a wife.
So sorry my dear Darling.

I love them very much, of course.
But holiday is a very busy day for me.

Oh! Today is the First busy day!

Bye.

Good morning Moring-san. This is Umi.
Thank you for your response.

〉LTNS. This is Moring.

Yes. Me too.
Perhaps it's been 2 years since I talked to you.

I think you look great.
I enjoyed your Ugly Agree Animoprhs(!?)-like Prince Story.

〉You are changing email with foreigners, aren't you?

Once in a while. She's a Chinese Malaysian.
Let me add this message was written by her friend.

It made me laugh.
It has wit and humor.
It has a little bit of poison, too.

I like it.
I'd like to send it. But whom?
I have no idea who enjoy it.

Then a good idea hit on me. Bulletin Board...

〉〉Sharing..

〉These are very funny. Thank you.

I'm glad to hear that. I'd worried a little.
My husband bursted into a laugh when he read.
But I don't think this mail makes every male laugh.

〉And I tried to make one.
〉Would you read this?

Yes! Yes! I'd like to.

〉Feel Safe

〉A man feels safe when he is with his wife and children.

It's beautiful! Sweet and warm.
Let me say thank you, instead of her.
I think his feeling will make her so happy.
Please tell him "Say her this"

〉A woman feels safe when she is without her husband and children.

I think I know similar phrase in Japanese.
It's ringing in my head now.
But I won't say it.
It's a kind of girls talk. I think.

〉Do you make sense?

How great!! You handle it.
I enjoyed your response. It's nice!!

Thank you!

Hi Umi-san. This is Moring.

〉Good morning Moring-san. This is Umi.
Oh! Is this "SHA-RE"?

〉Thank you for your response.
You are welcome.

〉Perhaps it's been 2 years since I talked to you.
Yes. Perhaps, you asked me how to write english writing, didn't you?

〉I think you look great.
〉I enjoyed your Ugly Agree Animoprhs(!?)-like Prince Story.
Thank you.

〉Once in a while. She's a Chinese Malaysian.
You have a good friend.
Then your English writing is improving.
Would you write messages on this boad sometme?

〉Then a good idea hit on me. Bulletin Board...
Then we could "Share" them.

〉I'm glad to hear that. I'd worried a little.
〉My husband bursted into a laugh when he read.
〉But I don't think this mail makes every male laugh.
Oh! Your husband can understand English very well. That's good.
I showed this my friend yesterday. But he didn't laugh.
He could understand the statements. But he could not get the point.
Then I explain how funny they are. BUt he could only smile bit.

〉〉A man feels safe when he is with his wife and children.
〉It's beautiful! Sweet and warm.
〉Let me say thank you, instead of her.
I think every man have this sweet and warm like your husband.

〉I think his feeling will make her so happy.
〉Please tell him "Say her this"
Then your husband may make you so happy.

〉〉A woman feels safe when she is without her husband and children.
〉I think I know similar phrase in Japanese.
〉It's ringing in my head now.
Yes. I got a hint from that CM.

〉How great!! You handle it.
〉I enjoyed your response. It's nice!!
〉Thank you!
Thank you. too.

Happy Reading & Writing!
Moring

Hi Moring-san. This is Umi.
Please call me "Umi".

〉〉Good morning Moring-san. This is Umi.
〉Oh! Is this "SHA-RE"?

Sure. Actually it's "DA-jare"　(^^ゞ
And "Good" was like "掛け言葉". I intended to use it.
I doubt my plan has succeeded.

In addition, the first I wrote.
"The morning sun shines today. Good morning Moring-san"
Deleted.
I was so embarrassed.

"Moring" is good name, I think.

〉Yes. Perhaps, you asked me how to write english writing, didn't you?

Memories...Yes, I did.
You gave me a big help.
I really owe you.

〉You have a good friend.
〉Then your English writing is improving.
〉Would you write messages on this boad sometme?

Thank you for your suggestion.
Maybe I'll try.

〉〉I'm glad to hear that. I'd worried a little.
〉〉My husband bursted into a laugh when he read.
〉〉But I don't think this mail makes every male laugh.

〉Oh! Your husband can understand English very well. That's good.

I think it depend on his character.
He's something round(!?) like his shape. (Sorry my Dear...)
I mean he's not square.

〉I showed this my friend yesterday. But he didn't laugh.
〉He could understand the statements. But he could not get the point.
〉Then I explain how funny they are. BUt he could only smile bit.

That is a pity. You couldn't share with him, could you?
I think I was lucky. I can share it.
You guys and my Dear. Thank you.

〉〉〉A man feels safe when he is with his wife and children.
〉〉It's beautiful! Sweet and warm.
〉〉Let me say thank you, instead of her.

〉I think every man have this sweet and warm like your husband.

And like YOU.

〉〉I think his feeling will make her so happy.
〉〉Please tell him "Say her this"

〉Then your husband may make you so happy.

Absolutely agree!
I think I'll request him.　(#^.^#)

〉〉〉A woman feels safe when she is without her husband and children.
〉〉I think I know similar phrase in Japanese.
〉〉It's ringing in my head now.

〉Yes. I got a hint from that CM.

Oops! Was it on the air?
It leaked out! Males knew it!
While my female friends and me talked about it in small voices.
So pity! (^_-)-☆

I enjoy writing now. Thank you.

Happy Reading & Writing!

〉Hello, friends.

Hi

〉This is Umi.

Hello, Umi. This is Banana.
Nice to talk with you.

〉I got this mail from my friend.

You have a good friend.
I wish I have one.

〉Sharing..

Thank you for your sharing.

I read all execises of elementary mathematics.
It is very fun.
I love.

I wish I make up one.

I'll be in touch.

Bye-bye

#P.S.

I use the frase of "I'll be in touch".
I have had wanted to use it.
It is cool for me.

The fraze is used in "GUN MONKEY" by Victor Gishler.
It is HARDBOILED.

Hero used the fraze, as he said bye-bye to his girlfriend,kissing her!
###

Hi, Banana.

〉Nice to talk with you.

Me too. I'm so glad.

〉You have a good friend.

Thank you. She is great.

〉I wish I have one.

I wish, you were.

〉Thank you for your sharing.

Thank you for your taking.
I like this message.
I'd like to share it.

〉I read all execises of elementary mathematics.
〉It is very fun.
〉I love.

Oh! I'm glad to hear that.
It's a kind of girls talk.
It's fun and light, but something real.

〉I wish I make up one.

Will it be a kind of mens talk version?
Will it be fun and light, but something scare?

I'm looking forward to...you'll make up one.

〉I'll be in touch.

I'm looking forward to...you'll be in touch.

〉#P.S.

〉I use the frase of "I'll be in touch".
〉I have had wanted to use it.
〉It is cool for me.

I see. Thank you for your kindness.

〉The fraze is used in "GUN MONKEY" by Victor Gishler.
〉It is HARDBOILED.

Sorry I don't know "GUN MONKEY"
But is it HARDBOILED?!
I guess Nate grew up to be a tough guy.
Maybe so cool!

〉Hero used the fraze, as he said bye-bye to his girlfriend,kissing her!
〉###

Sure. I'll love to. I think she's glad to hear that.
But actually she told me in that mail...↓

Sharing..

T×××× <t××××@××××> wrote:

See you later.